Wednesday, June 12, 2013

FATHERS DAY AIN'T FOR YOU BITCH. ITS FOR ME. JUST ME.

 
SHIT DONT SAY "MOM" ANYWHERE HERE.



YO THIS RARE POST IS IN ANTICIPATION OF ALL THE SHITFACE DURAG WEARING FACIAL PIERCED BARTENDING HOOKAH SMOKING LOVE & HIPHOP HOPEFUL BITCHES (AND NIGGAS) THAT'S GONNA DEMOLISH MY ADULATION ON FATHERS DAY VIA TWITTER.

WHAT IS THESE BITCHES PROBLEM B?

CAN I FUCKIN LIVE?

I GET IT, YOUR DAD WAS A PIECE OF SHIT BUT YOUR MOM ALREADY HAS A SPECIAL DAY DEDICATED TO HER FOR EXPELLING YOU FROM HER UTERUS B. IT'S CALLED "MOTHER'S DAY" YOU INSOLENT BITCH. STOP BLOWIN MINE BY TALKIN ABOUT "HAPPY FATHERS DAY TO MY MOM WHO DID EVERYTHING FOR ME! SHE WAS MY DAD AND MY MOM!"

INCREDIBLE B LETS GIVE THAT BITCH A MEDAL FOR NOT BREAKING THE LAW. YOUR MOMS WAS STUCK WITH YOU CUZ YOUR POPS BOUNCED! UNLESS SHE WAS A COMPLETE JUNKBOX SHE WAS LIKE "FUCK, I'M STUCK WITH THIS KID...FUCK IT." AT SOME POINT SHE WAS PROBABLY LIKE "IMA FUCKIN BOUNCE ON THIS NIGGA AND THIS PUNK ASS KID" BUT YOUR DAD BEAT HER TO THE PUNCH CUZ HE DOESN'T HAVE THAT WEIRD CHEMICAL THAT MAKES WOMEN CRY WHEN THEY BABY CRIES OR WHATEVER. I WANT ONE OF YOU MEDICAL NIGGAS TO VERIFY THAT FOR ME CUZ MY WIFE TOLD ME THIS IS A NATURAL THING AND I DON'T BELIEVE HER BECAUSE WHITE PEOPLE ARE THE DEVIL.

IF YOU ARE A DUDE AND YOU OVER HERE SINGING YOUR MOMS PRAISES ON FATHER'S DAY YOU ARE A FUCKING COWARD B. YOU ARE ALSO PROBABLY PUERTO RICAN. PUERTO RICAN NIGGAS DO THIS SHIT WHERE THEY BOUNCE ON THEY KIDS AND COMPLETELY DISAPPEAR, DOMINICAN DUDES STAY WITH THEY WIFE & KIDS AND JUST GO MAKE A WHOLE NOTHER WIFE & KIDS IN ANOTHER SECTION OF THEY CITY. SHOUTOUT TO US. I STILL HAVE NOT STARTED TO CULTIVATE MY SECOND FAMILY BECAUSE I HAVE CHOSEN TO PROCREATE WITH A JEWISH WOMAN AND SHE IS VERY BOSSY AND STRANGE. THE WORST THING I COULD DO IS GO MAKE ANOTHER BITCH PREGGAETON B. MY CURRENT SPOUSE IS STRESSFUL ENOUGH B. I WOULD NEED THERAPY OR SOME SHIT.

JK THERAPY IS FOR MENTAL WEAKLINGS I'LL PROLLY JUST BE THE FIRST NIGGA TO OVERDOSE ON WEED AND CAP'N CRUNCH. YO YOU EVER GET SO HIGH YOU EATING SOMETHING IN A LARGE CONTAINER AND YOU END UP EATING WAY MORE THAN YOU INTENDED TO? THEN YOUR WIFE WAKES UP THE NEXT DAY AND COMES INTO THE BEDROOM AND HOLDS UP A ICE CREAM CARTON WITH 2 SPOONFULS LEFT AND SAYS "WE BOUGHT THIS YESTERDAY. YOU'RE A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT...AND FOR THE LAST TIME GET YOUR FUCKING "WEED TOOLS" OUTTA THE LIVINGROOM! THE BABY COULD HURT HIMSELF." YES PARENTS, DO NOT LEAVE A WOODEN WEED GRINDER ON YOUR COFFEE TABLE BECAUSE YOUR CHILD MAY INJURE HISSELF ON IT. IT SEEMS INOCUOUS BUT IT CAN BE FATAL.

LISTEN MAN ALL I'M TRYNA DO IS GO TO FATHERS DAY BRUNCH AT TOSCA AND WALK AROUND HOLDING MY TODDLER SON'S HAND (HE'S TOTES ADORBZ, ASK AROUND) AND BE CONGRATULATED BY STRANGE WOMEN MUCH TO THE CHAGRIN OF MY SPOUSINGTON. DO NOT PUT A DAMPER ON MY SHIT ON TWITTER.

"MERO WHY DON'T YOU JUST NOT GO ON TWITTER?"

BECAUSE I UPDATE THIS BLOG LESS FREQUENTLY THAN YOUR GRANDMOTHER UPDATES HER KITTY LITTER NIGGA AND TWITTER IS MY TOOL TO KEEP MY "FANS" ENTERTAINED. I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING CORNBALL CALLING NIGGAS "FANS" BUT THIS ONE GIRL STEPPED TO THE DJ BOOTH AT THIS PARTY I WAS "DJ'ING" OFF MY PHONE AND WAS LIKE "OH MY GOD THIS IS CRAZY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I FEEL LIKE A STALKER ETC ETC" AND I WAS OVERCOME WITH JOY BECAUSE SHE WAS A CUTE MULATTO WOMAN WHICH MADE ME FEEL GOOD INSIDE BECAUSE UNLIKE THE HIGH RANKING OFFICIALS OF BLACKTWITTER I DO NOT WANT MY FANBASE TO BE A BUNCH OF NIGGAS WHO BUY EVERY IPHONE AND TALK ABOUT "SNEAKER CULTURE" UGH. GO FLY A KITE. ALL MY ARTSCHOOL GIRL FANS I LOVE Y'ALL, *GUITAR RIFF* YOU KNOW OUR LOVE WAS MEANT TO BEEEEEE..KIND OF LOVE TO LAAAAST--FOREVUEEEHHH...AND I WANTCHU HERE WITHMEEEEEEE, FROM TONIIIIGHT UNTIL THYEND OF TIIIIIIIME. *PIANO* YEEEWWW SHOULD KNOOOW, EV-RY-WHERE-AGO, ALWAYS ON MA MIND,  IN MUH HEART, IN MAH SOWUL. BAAABY YOU'RE THE MEEEEANING IN MALIFE, YOU'RE THE INSPA RAY SHUUUUUNNNNN

AIGHT I'M OUT GO FUCK YOURSELF, HIT MY PAYPAL OR GO TELL YOUR MOM HAPPY FATHER'S DAY CUZ YOUR DAD WAS A FUCKIN JERKOFF THAT DON'T KNOW HOW TO PULL OUT RIGHT.

#KNOWLEDGEDARTS

8 comments:

  1. FATHERS > MOTHERSJune 12, 2013 at 5:36 PM

    Thank you Mero for speaking out against this prevalent man-hating anti-Father feminist bullshit.

    Mother's Day already gets more respect than Fathers Day as it is, but now they don't want Fathers to have their own day.

    I guess I have a unique perspective because I was raised in a single-parent home, but I was raised by my Dad and never really knew my Mom. So the whole anti-Dad shit bewilders me.

    And you don't see me telling my dad "Happy Mother's Day pops."

    And Happy Father's Day to you Mero. I ain't a Dad but shout out to all the (male) Dads out there.

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